The Power of a Pause
Pause before you speak!
Between meetings, emails, and the unrelenting pace of life, it’s easy to lose touch with how much stress or emotion we’re carrying. Most people I coach are feeling stretched thin–overwhelmed with stress, running on empty, and just trying to hold it together.
When we’re in this state, our words often move faster than our awareness. And before we know it, our unconscious reactions have set off a chain of misunderstandings that keep stress spiraling up and clear communication spiraling down.
That’s where the power of a pause can make all the difference in what others hear and how they feel.
A pause gives your mind space to catch up with your mouth. It lets your nervous system reset, your awareness return, and your words align with your intention.
It’s the small, quiet moment that changes everything.
Why a Pause Works
When stress hits, our brain’s survival system takes over. We speak from protection, not connection. Our tone sharpens, our patience thins, and our clarity fades.
Pausing interrupts that pattern.
It creates a moment of choice between reaction and response.
And it only takes a few seconds for your brain to shift from fight-flight-freeze into the part of the nervous system that governs logic, empathy, and self-awareness.
How to Practice Taking a Pause
The next time you’re in a meeting or having a conversation that triggers frustration, defensiveness, or avoidance–try this.
Take a conscious breath. Let one slow inhale and exhale bring you back into your body.
Notice your reaction. Where do you feel tension? Is it in your stomach, jaw, or shoulders? Awareness diffuses reactivity.
Create a small, silent space. Count to five (5) in your mind before responding. Let the movement stretch for a beat or two.
Choose your next move. Ask yourself: “How do you want to handle this situation–with reaction, curiosity, or understanding?
Then speak calmly and intentionally. When you do, you’ll sound calmer and more confident. And others will feel it.
This short pause (sometimes no more than a breath or two) can shift the entire tone of a conversation. It prevents escalation, restores clarity, and models emotional maturity in real time.
Know that you may not feel completely calm on the inside–and that’s okay. You will still project a sense of poise under pressure and that’s what matters.
The Subtle Strength of Stillness
When you practice pausing, you train your nervous system to trust stillness. You learn to listen with your whole body. And you respond from your healthiest style expression, rather than your style under stress.
Over time, that quiet power changes the way people experience you. You become the one who is calm in the chaos. The person others trust when things get hard. And the one that others listen to because your words carry weight (not volume) and your clarity help others find their own.
Creating a Daily Practice
Each day, find one moment to practice the pause.
It could be before you reply to an email, enter a meeting, or reply to a question that stirs emotion.
Take a couple of intentional breaths.
Count to five (5) in your mind.
And let silence settle in.
Notice how this simple practice create space for clarity, composure, and connection–within you and all around you. And remember, sometimes the most powerful you can say is nothing at.
Here’s to pausing before we speak, listening between the lines, and letting our words elevate every conversation.
Happily,
Maryanne
